This particular bath time took place on Sunday evening. We'd planted flowers and played outside all afternoon and evening. If the dirtier you are is directly correlated to the fun you've had, we all had an absolute blast. It was after 7:30 p.m., and an already tired two-year-old did not understand the necessity of getting clean. Here's how it went down:
Ellie: (whining) "It's too hot!"
Me: "It's too hot?" (checking water again)
Ellie: "It's too cold!"
Me: "It's not too cold."
Ellie: "Yes it is! It's cold! ... It's hot."
Me: "It's not too hot or too cold. The temperature of the water is just fine."
Ellie: "Okay. I want bubbles."
Me: "No problem. What's the magic word?"
Me: "Okay, let's make some bubbles." (turns water back on and pours a little Burt's Bees Baby Shampoo and Wash into the water stream)
Ellie: "I don't want those bubbles!"
Me: "Ellie, it's too late. You have bubbles now."
Ellie: "But I don't want them!" (fake cries for a moment but then gets it together) "I want toys."
Me: "Sure. What's the magic word?"
Me: "Which bath toys would you like?"
Ellie: "All of them!"
Me: "Nope. We're taking a quick bath tonight. Just pick a couple."
Ellie: "Noooooo! I want all the toys!"
Me: "How about..." (insert nearly every bath toy option the girl has here)
Ellie: "No. I don't want that one." (repeats with each option)
Me: "Okay, no toys then. Let's just get you clean."
Ellie: "No! I don't wanna get clean. I want more bubbles."
Me: "No ma'am. We're not using more bubbles tonight."
Ellie: "Please, please! I want more bubbles! Puh-lease!"
Me: "How about your boat? Would you like to play with your boat?"
Ellie: "Yes! I want the boat!"
Me: "Great!" (hands boat to Ellie) "What are you supposed to say?"
Me: "Well, that's a very nice magic word, but after you get something you want or need you should say 'thank you.'"
Ellie: "Thank you. I don't wanna play with this boat. I want my animals."
Me: (losing patience) "Hand me your boat please. Here are your animals, and here are your cups. You have lots of fun with these cups!"
Ellie: "I'm ready to get out now. I'm all done now."
Me: "You're finished."
Ellie: "Okay, I'm finished."
Me: "Yes, that's correct, but, no, we still need to get you clean. I'll wash you super fast!"
Ellie: "Okay." (begins playing with toys and putting them on the edge of the tub getting water on the floor)
Me: "Ellie, keep your toys in the tub. They're getting water on the floor." (takes hand towel and wipes up the water)
Ellie: (continues putting toys in the edge and getting more water in the floor)
Me: "Ellie, stop! Keep your toys in the tub. You're getting the floor wet." (wipes floor again)
Ellie: (continues to ignore me and put more toys on the edge soaking the floor)
Me: (very frustrated with an elevated tone of voice) "Ellie, I've already asked you twice to stop. Do not put another toy on the edge of this tub!"
Ellie: (in a singsong voice) "What's the magic word?"